Friends With Benefits?
Updated: Jan 24, 2019
A friend with whom one has sex without a romantic relationship or commitment...is the official definition of friends with benefits according to dictionary.com (Ha! I was surprised to find it in the dictionary, too)
We have all heard of the phrase, either experienced it, or even watched the movie, but how many of us truly believe that such a thing can exist? Can one have a successful FWB situation without feelings getting involved, hearts being broken, or great friendships crumbling?
According to some, it can work if the rules are in place. Let's take a look at a few of them!
Set your expectations and boundaries
In Glamour Magazine*, relationship expert Dr. Emily Morse, says when starting a FWB situationship "It's best to be as transparent as possible, open to compromises, and never judgmental or make conversations one-sided." This creates clear boundaries and expectations about what you want and what you don't want. This also helps avoid confusion later down the road.
Communication is key
Every successful FWB situation must have check-ins where both parties ensure they are still on the same page, on the same wave, at the same time. Even when expectations are set upfront, one may change how they feel about the situation or become too involved. If communication is not open and flowing freely, this could create resentment and love that unrequited. In the beginning, determine the frequency of your check-ins and how you plan to have them.
There's a difference between FWB and No-Strings-Attached
Here is where things get blurry. In a FWB situation, the keyword is friends. When two friends decide to become intimate with one another, a foundation of friendship and trust has already been established. They confide in one another and maybe hangout once in awhile - sex is the perk of their friendship! With No-Strings-Attached it is strictly sexual, nothing more, nothing less. There is no hanging out, no sharing of feelings, and definitely no intimate moments, such as cuddling or late night phone conversations. When one starts to blend FWB with a romantic relationship or No-Strings-Attached with FWB it creates confusion. So know which situation you're in and act accordingly.
Lastly, have fun!
The intent of FWB is not have a serious relationship, so don't make things serious. Walk into the situation with the only intention of having fun with one another. But let's be clear, you may not be the only one having fun with your friend so always be careful and practice safe sex.
Video provided by Sony Pictures Releasing UK via YouTube
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